My generation has lost one of it’s privileges, but not because someone took it away. We simply fail to do it, and therefore miss out on the joy and pleasure that comes from giving it. What is it?
Honor.
Today, on Memorial Day, everyone speaks of honor. Well, many do. It’s true that regardless of how you feel politically about any war we’ve ever been involved in, the soldiers who have fought and served deserve our honor. But while today might be a day to honor our troops, the whole idea of honoring someone is so much bigger.
Last week, I was catching up on some podcasts and I listened to an interview with Steven Furtick. He’s the pastor of Elevation Church in Charlotte, NC. I heard Steven speak briefly at Catalyst back in ‘08, and really enjoyed him. I also loved hearing him tell a story in this interview about a pastor he previously served under.
He explained that there was a difference between honor, and respect. And while he couldn’t respect the leader he was serving under, the leader still deserved to be honored, because he was his pastor, and a good man. The honor Steven gave him had a profound impact later on in this man’s life. It was memorable. It was humbling. It was transforming. And that doesn’t even include the additional character built up and displayed in Steven, the one giving honor. His ability and willingness to honor someone who deserved to be honored impacted them both.
It kind of got me thinking…
Why don’t other people my age, (and younger), honor others? And why have we lost that ability? What happened? And what could happen if we learned to do it once again? What if we created a culture of honor?
I agree with Steven, (whom his church calls “Pastor Steven” by the way, simply in an effort to honor him), that there really is a difference between honor and respect. Someone who deserves to be honored can lose my respect. For example…
There are magicians who haven’t earned my respect, both now and from the past, but some of them need to be honored. It’s easy to poke fun at the “old guys” because they had rabbits and top hats, along with matching tuxedos. It’s easy for my generation to label it “cheesy”, but while I don’t respect each of them, I believe they deserve to be honored for their contribution to my art, and for keeping magic alive. Of course we see it as cheesy now. It’s 2010. Tuxes were hot in 1920. But who am I, and who are you to judge?? Why not honor them, even if you don’t respect them? If labeling it cheesy is your way of saying, “Look how cool I am”, personally, I think you need to get over yourself.
And what about our parents? I know, I know. We get older, gain perspective, and become increasingly aware of their mistakes. Maybe it’s hard for you now to respect your mom or dad. But they still deserve to be honored. It may not make sense to you right now, but your decision to do so could change their lives, and yours in the process. Think I’m crazy? I dare you to try it. You might be the first and only person to ever honor them, and I bet you’ll gain their respect in the process.
If you’re struggling with honoring someone because you don’t think they deserve it, why? Because they weren’t perfect? C’mon…look in the mirror.
A question…
What would happen if you honored your wife? Or your girlfriend? Like, really honored her?
What would happen if you honored your husband? What would honoring him actually look like?
What kind of people would your children grow up to be if they grew up watching two people consistently honor each other?
George W. Bush supposedly wore a suit every single day of his stay at the White House, because he “wanted to bring honor to the presidency”.
Honoring my wife is a privilege. The same is true for my parents. And my grandparents. And honoring those who have gone before me, from magicians to leaders to soldiers is a privilege as well. One I hope and pray my generation doesn’t completely lose as we continue to rip apart everything we disagree with. There’s nothing wrong with discussion and debate, and respect is most definitely something that has to be earned. But in the process of re-envisioning our futures, I hope we don’t forget to honor those in our past. And our present. If we do, I fear that we may lose our honor as well.
Let’s honor those who need to be honored. Before they’re dead.
Tags: catalyst, Elevation Church, Harris, Honor, Honoring Others, illusionist, Memorial Day, Respect, Steven Furtick
well said, friend.
Thanks, Laura.